Posted on Leave a comment

Apocalyptic Love Songs 13

He barely glanced up as he heard the two thugs scramble away. He couldn’t blame them — if you’d spent your whole life committing various crimes, seeing real evil in action would be too much for even the most jaded of people, he supposed. He did look up when he sensed Castiel joining him, the flaming sword still in his hand. Castiel grasped his shoulder, so Dean reached back a hand to lay over it and turned his head to lightly kiss Castiel’s wrist.

“Dean,” Castiel said, “step away from Sam.”

“What?” Dean said and then looked into Sam’s face, into his eyes. They were completely yellow.

“Thanks for getting rid of the bitch,” Sam said and swung a punch at Dean, connecting hard with his jaw. Dean staggered, and when Castiel tried to catch him Sam raised his hand. There was a blast of wind that knocked Castiel off his feet so that he skittered across the courtyard like a dead leaf.

“Cas!” Dean screamed. He shoved himself to his feet, his body aching, and shouted at Sam, “So help me, if you’ve hurt him –”

“Shut up, Dean,” Sam said and knocked Dean off his feet with a mere gesture. Dean sprawled on the ground, gasping for breath. “I’m done listening to you. You’re not strong enough for this — I’ve been telling you all along.” He knelt on the ground by Lorcan’s body and picked up the dish that bore his head. “I am.”

Dean crawled across the wet pavement to Castiel, who was lying much, much too still, his head and one leg at a horrible, twisted angle. “Cas,” Dean whispered and pulled on his wet coat. “Cas, wake up. I need you. Castiel.”

“Dean,” Castiel whispered and opened his eyes. His pupils were dilated and there was blood on his teeth when he spoke. “Save Sam.”

“Cas, you’re hurt, heal yourself, I know you can –”

“Save Sam,” Castiel repeated, so Dean leaned their foreheads together a moment and then forced himself to his feet.

“Sam!” he roared and stumbled back across the courtyard to the labyrinth. Sam was holding up the dish with the severed head on it, and his eyes were closed as he rocked on his knees, muttering in Latin. “You don’t want to do this, Sam!”

Sam lowered the dish and opened his eyes. “You don’t know what I want, Dean. You never have. You forced me back into this life. You led the yellow-eyed demon to me so he could kill Jess. You’ve always pushed me on, never let me settle down, never let me find my own place, never let me make my own decisions.”

“I died for you, Sam!”

“And came back broken,” Sam said.

Dean squeezed his eyes shut, wiped the rain from his face, and said roughly, “I came back damaged, Sammy, but not broken.” He picked up the sword. “I’m strong enough to stop you.”

Sam turned to him and with a gesture, yanked the sword from Dean’s hand. “I need that.” He rose from his knees and held up the sword, his face more grim than Dean had ever seen it. “I’m opening the door, Dean. Don’t try to stop me. I’ll kill you.”

“Don’t do this, Sam,” Dean pleaded. “This isn’t you. You don’t know what Hell is like — I do. You can’t make the Earth into Hell’s image. Think of all the people who’ll suffer.”

“You don’t get it, do you, Dean?” Sam said wearily. “This isn’t about Hell. This isn’t even about Heaven. This is about a New Earth. My Earth. No more demons, no more ghosts, no more suffering. A perfect world where everybody does exactly what they’re told. I can make this happen, Dean.” He held up the cup. “I can make it happen with this. It wants to help everybody get into Heaven, right? This is how.”

“That’s not helping,” Dean said. “It’s taking away everything that makes humanity wonderful.”

“People are dicks, Dean. You know it as well as I do.”

“Yeah, they are,” Dean said, “but they’re human. Take away choice and you take away potential, you take away beauty, you take away imagination — Utopia doesn’t come from everybody being alike. It comes from everybody being happy.”

“Same difference,” said Sam.

“Big difference! Nobody was ever forced into a happy life!”

Sam snorted, and as Dean watched, horrified, Sam worked open the mouth on Lorcan’s severed head and murmured another incantation. The head groaned and its eyes opened, and the invisible walls of the Grail castle flickered into view as lightning flashed. Sam continued chanting and the head picked it up so that their two voices chanted in unison. The walls flickered and wavered like any of the ghosts they’d dealt with over the years.

“Sam,” Dean said desperately, “when Cas took me out of the fire he brought me to this mountain where the Fishers live, and I had a vision, Sam, I had a vision under the world tree of all the possibilities of my life — but no matter how perfect the vision were it wasn’t right because it didn’t have the people I love most in them.”

Sam stopped chanting, though the head continued, and glared at Dean. “Castiel,” he scoffed. “Your star.”

“Castiel,” Dean admitted and swallowed hard. “And you.”

Leave a Reply